After breaking one of Tim's tools that has been in the family for twenty years, Mark fears that he will be traded in after Brad and Randy make up a story about ""Peter"", their former brother that was traded in after he broke one of Tim's flashlights.
When she can't find a babysitter, Jill has a magician watch the kids while she and Tim go on their romantic dinner. However, Tim is too distracted by a football game to pay attention to her. Meanwhile, the kids accidentally lock the magician in a trunk.
The K&B Construction guys are invited on Tool Time to show how to make hot gourmet meals while on the job site. They use the tools of their trade to make meals anyone would be proud of. At home, Jill is fed up with Brad and Randy excluding Mark from their games so she has a talk with them. Brad and Randy tell Mark that they, along with Tim and Jill, are aliens from outer space. But Mark gets his own back when Tim and Jill dress up as aliens and scare Brad and Randy.
Tim decides to do a Tool Time special for women to teach plumbing. After being called an idiot by Randy, Brad worries that he will do bad on a test. Tim starts his hotrod.
Jill gets stage fright when she has to deliver a speech in front of women at the Library Association. Tim and Mark dress up as women to help her get over her fear.
Tim and Jill have a bowling match against eachother and try no to make it competitive, until the K&B Construction guys show up. The boys get in trouble at an arcade.
Jill doesn't want Stu Cutler, Tim's old college friend, in the house. So Tim tries to keep him away but when he gives in and Stu comes to the house, he insults Tim and Jill and belches with the boys.
Tim gets Jill a lifetime membership to a health care club, until she says she will never exercise again. Brad and Randy spend all of their money on a baseball card, so they make Mark give them a "brother tax" to get Jill a present.
Jill tells Tim that he is a bad listener when he doesn't remember her mentioning the opera fundraiser. Brad and Randy try to get Mark to eat a worm while working on a birdhouse.